Dear Yogi,

I don’t know you, I’ve never met you, I have only seen the little tiny portion of your life that you’ve decided to share on Instagram. This is also the same for you with me so I was a bit surprised this morning when you decided to have an opinion on my choice of ice cream. 

Now let’s get a few things straight, I might blog about being vegan but I do not claim to be an expert on nutrition nor do I put myself forward as a shining example of clean eating. I like to share pictures of vegan food because I find it exciting to see that you can live a full, healthy and happy life without harming animals. I am aware that even if only one person reads my blog, (and I’m pretty certain that only one person reads my blog, Hi Mam), then I don’t want to pretend I’m something I’m not. There’s enough skinny white blonde women telling people what not to eat without me adding my voice to the noise. I like to share food that makes me happy, quite a lot of this is healthy food because eating healthy makes me happy, but guess what?? So does eating an ice cream from time to time. 

I don’t need to justify myself, even if I ate only ice cream and drank soya milkshakes instead of water, bathed in coconut cream and used sugar as toothpaste, I still wouldn’t have to justify myself. The fact is though that I eat a healthy diet which is low sugar and high in nutrients, I eat well over 8 portions of vegetables a day, I’m careful to get my protein and I truly truly love my food. 

I say this because it wasn’t always the case. I suffered with bulemia from the age of 11 right up until my early twenties, it’s hard to write this because not everyone knows, and there’s part of me that feels like admitting it is admitting to a failure, that people will think of me differently after they know.

Recovery has been hard and it has taken me years to get to the point where I can eat a dessert and not feel guilt so bad that it physically shakes my body until I throw it back up, but guess what? I’m there!  

So when I post the picture of my ice cream that arrived in my shopping today, the ice cream I’m going to share with my husband cuddled up on the sofa, the ice cream that I’m going to savour and enjoy and not feel guilty about at all, when I post that picture and you point out the sugar content all I can say is screeeeeeeeeeeeew you! 

I was going to save it for a treat, but do you know what? I’m going to eat it right now!